TM speech number 1

Before Paris Hilton got arrested for DUI, before Britney Spears became a mom, before Brad and Angelina got together, before Kobe and Shaq broke up, there was Patrick Garcia.

I grew up in what I call the "Patrick Garcia Generation". And if you were around that time, you would understand why I call it as such. I mean, every body loves Patrick Garcia. I could still remember the wonderful words they used to describe Patrick. He was just a phenomenon. Every high school and college lady I know loves to be with Patrick Garcia. Some probably would even go as far as taking their clothes off for him. Some are simply crazy about him.

Every boy in my small town wants to be him. Who would not? Imagine being chased by ladies. Imagine being so adored. That's what I think what it would be like to be. At one point, I would say I was willing to trade all I have to be like Patrick Garcia. And I tried. I tried, like other boys in my town, to change my looks. I started with my hair. You see, Patrick Garcia was famous for his straight one-length hair so I started by combing my hair so that it will be one-length. I still remembered spending hours and hours in front of the mirror or in the bathroom pouring shampoo and conditioner so that I can have a hair like Patrick's. I failed. I have a wavy-curly hair. I got it from my father. My hair just won't conform to the Patrick Garcia hairstyle. But I still pushed through. I still formed it to make it one-length. Imagine a wavy hair formed like TM Loyd's hair (Install Team TL). It was a disaster. Nevertheless I still tried. But later on I got frustrated with my looks. I feel so ugly. I started not to like myself. I even asked my mother why in the world I inherited my father's curly hair and not her very beautiful straight hair. I hated my hair. I became insecure. I had trouble expressing my feelings to anybody I like- I was "torpe". At that time, it seems like being rejected is inevitable. It was just an emotional mess.

Until my life made an unprecedented turn I got admitted to a hospital and later on was diagnosed with pneumonia. It turned out that I got it from the camping trip that I attended. I thought I was going to die because my back hurts; I was coughing blood and I have a hard time breathing. I prayed to God and realized that I was too young to die. Death put the things in my life into right perspective. I realized that I have not showed my mother how much I love and appreciate her. I realized that I have not been a good brother to my sisters. I realized I have not hug my mom enough. I realized I have not really enjoyed my life. I was busy becoming somebody else. I was busy wanting to be Patrick Garcia. "What a waste.", I thought. I have not lived my life wisely and I regretted every single thing about it. Somehow I wanted to survive and make up for the lost time. I told the Lord that I want to live but if He wants me to die it's alright but I regretted living the way I lived. I prepared myself to die in regret. But the day after, the doctor told me that I'll be alright. And so I went home but I was no longer the same guy who went into that hospital. I was determined to be alive. I was determined to live my life better. I decided to show my love to my mother and sisters. I decided to face my fears; The moment I came back to school, without fear I declared my love to my crush for 3 years. Though she was probably shocked seeing me so alive and so passionate about life we never got together but I never regretted expressing my feelings. I no longer fear rejection. To me entertaining fear is a waste of time. I focused on living and I started to love myself. I realized that God created me to be Joseph Librero and not to be Patrick. Yes, I may not have a straight hair but I am, as the Bible says, fearfully and wonderfully made by God. I am unique and proud of it. You know what, the people around begun to appreciate me. As Howard Thurman said, Don't ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive.
And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." Today, my challenge for you is to come alive.