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By 
2:46 PM
Last Wednesday in the Cutting Edge Fellowship, Pastor Noel talked about fear and how it affects our confidence level.
I would like to share to you an acronym of the word FEAR that best describes it:
FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real
Most of our fears possesses some kind of evidence in our mind and from these evidences we consider them as real.
But in a closer inspection we will soon realize that most of them (if not all) are unfounded.
Say for example, a person who is afraid to speak in public (I picked this since according to Reader's Digest, public speaking is America's number one fear) ,
may have the following evidences in his/her mind :
- He/she is afraid because of previous speaking experience that went south - this is an evidence based on the past
- He/she is afraid because of another fear - called fear of rejection or fear of failure.
- He/she is afraid because of self-limitation - "I can't do it" evidence
- He/she is afraid because he/she has not tried speaking in public before. - I call this the "lack of experience" evidence.
Basing on these we can see that such fear is unfounded. Let me quickly run down each item and refute them:
Previous experience that went south.
This is a common source of fear. This happens when we had a very bad experience in the past that our mind just associate pain to that experience.
We tend to get avoid experiences that will associate us with the pain we experienced in the past. But we all know that the past will not determine our future so regardless of our past experience we should try again. If we failed in speaking in public in the past we need to try again. If we failed in a business venture in the past we should try again. If you failed in getting the girl in the past, then you should try again.
Fear off rejection and failure,
Fear of rejection and failure are probably the most common of fears. We know that while we are still alive in this world we will experience rejection and failure. Why not use rejection and failure to our advantage? How? When we get rejected, we learn from it and consider our approach and presentation. When we fail, we fail forward. Let me share to you a quote from John Maxwell in his book Failing Forward - "the difference between average people and achieving people is their perception of and response to failure."
Self-limitation
Self-limitations usually roots from childhood. It a result when those who we are with growing up (or mother,father,yaya,aunts, lolo,lola,uncles,older sis and brothers) did not expressed their confidence in us. I have the priviledge of watching my niece and nephew grow up and I can tell you the difference between a kid who is raised with express confindence and those who are not. I have a newphew is is raised in our "traditional Filipino way" of raising kids and another nephew who is raised in what I call "after-listening-to-a-parenting-seminar" way and I can tell you the big difference between how they speak in confidence. As a family we recognized that we always verbalize our confidence with the kids at home. Because we now know that there is a big difference in how kids turn out when you speak postively to them and when you don't.
If you have problem with self-limitation because of how you are raised, I think the best thing to do now is to know that the LORD is confident on you and He trust you.
So you don't have to live like a chicken, you need to live like an eagle. :)You have a choice not to be limited. You can choose to be more and not less.
And as Philippians 4:13 says,"I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES ME THE STRENGTH".
Lack of experience.
We often curl up when we don't have experience on a particular subject but the truth is, all of us started with no experience.
Those that belong in the top 10 percent today (in any industry) started in the buttom 10 percent. So if we allow lack of experience to stop us then we will never be able to move forward. And we will always be stagnated wondering how life would be if we tried.
Fear is a paralyzing entity that can stop us from becoming what God intends us to do. But knowing exactly what you fear and why you fear them will help you understand that
these fears are simply False Evidence Appearing Real. Good afternoon.
Joseph
Previous experience that went south.
This is a common source of fear. This happens when we had a very bad experience in the past that our mind just associate pain to that experience.
We tend to get avoid experiences that will associate us with the pain we experienced in the past. But we all know that the past will not determine our future so regardless of our past experience we should try again. If we failed in speaking in public in the past we need to try again. If we failed in a business venture in the past we should try again. If you failed in getting the girl in the past, then you should try again.
Fear off rejection and failure,
Fear of rejection and failure are probably the most common of fears. We know that while we are still alive in this world we will experience rejection and failure. Why not use rejection and failure to our advantage? How? When we get rejected, we learn from it and consider our approach and presentation. When we fail, we fail forward. Let me share to you a quote from John Maxwell in his book Failing Forward - "the difference between average people and achieving people is their perception of and response to failure."
Self-limitation
Self-limitations usually roots from childhood. It a result when those who we are with growing up (or mother,father,yaya,aunts, lolo,lola,uncles,older sis and brothers) did not expressed their confidence in us. I have the priviledge of watching my niece and nephew grow up and I can tell you the difference between a kid who is raised with express confindence and those who are not. I have a newphew is is raised in our "traditional Filipino way" of raising kids and another nephew who is raised in what I call "after-listening-to-a-parenting-seminar" way and I can tell you the big difference between how they speak in confidence. As a family we recognized that we always verbalize our confidence with the kids at home. Because we now know that there is a big difference in how kids turn out when you speak postively to them and when you don't.
If you have problem with self-limitation because of how you are raised, I think the best thing to do now is to know that the LORD is confident on you and He trust you.
So you don't have to live like a chicken, you need to live like an eagle. :)You have a choice not to be limited. You can choose to be more and not less.
And as Philippians 4:13 says,"I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES ME THE STRENGTH".
Lack of experience.
We often curl up when we don't have experience on a particular subject but the truth is, all of us started with no experience.
Those that belong in the top 10 percent today (in any industry) started in the buttom 10 percent. So if we allow lack of experience to stop us then we will never be able to move forward. And we will always be stagnated wondering how life would be if we tried.
Fear is a paralyzing entity that can stop us from becoming what God intends us to do. But knowing exactly what you fear and why you fear them will help you understand that
these fears are simply False Evidence Appearing Real. Good afternoon.
Joseph
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